Looking After Your Postpartum Mental Health

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Most parents will tell you, the first 3 months after a baby - known as the Fourth Trimester - can really affect your mental health. You’ve done so much already. From preparing for your baby’s arrival to mastering routines and surviving countless sleepless nights, so often, caring for yourself falls to the bottom of the list. Regardless if you’re caring for a newborn, tackling sleep regressions, or parenting multiples with different sleep needs, this stage can be as exhausting, emotional and messy so we've narrowed down our top tips for navigating parent life when you're sleep deprived, so you don't stay at the bottom of the list for too long.
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6 min read |
19 June, 2025

Top 5 Tips for Navigating Sleep Deprivation 

This guide is a gentle offering from the Love to Dream community about navigating sleep challenges through parenthood. From parents who’ve been there, still there, or found their rhythm after a long journey. It’s our way of saying: you're not alone, and you're doing better than you think.

1. Plan for Your Rest and Recovery

If you’re in the first few weeks with your newborn or trying to navigate a sleep regression, your sleep and well-being matters.  

Simple ways to look after yourself:

  • "Sleep when the baby sleeps". Yes, we’ve seen the memes but your laundry will still be there in 40 minutes. You might even be a little more rested to tackle it?
  • Survival of the snacks. Nutritious meals are great, but if today it’s cookies and a walk to the shower, so be it. Self care looks different everyday as a new parent.
  • Micro “me moments.” Ten minutes of silence, your favorite body wash, a TV show watched on our phone during 2am feeds, it’s all droplets in the parent cup.
"You can’t pour from an empty cup and nothing drains a cup faster than an adorable baby who’s poked holes in your sleep schedule." Elise, Mom of 2

2. Have the Talk (Before You’re Too Tired To Think Clearly)

Here are some practical tips on how to have conversations with loved ones about the kind of support you need, before you realize you need it:

  • Divide night duties. Will you rotate shifts? When do you get some time to have restorative sleep? Who is making dinner? Flexibility is key but even a loose plan when you have headspace for it can be a great default plan.

  • Feeding support. Whether breast, bottle, or combo, how can one of you help the other? With multiples, tandem feeding may take practice, but support makes all the difference.

  • Recharge time. When will each of you get 20 minutes to be alone, shower, or just be?

  • Use “I’m tapped out” signals. Having a no-judgment phrase to say “I need help now” prevents burnout.

  • Regular check-ins. Babies grow fast, and what works today may not tomorrow. Make space to recalibrate often.

💡 Tip: Write down your plan. Sleep-deprived brains forget things, having it in writing helps.

"Having open, honest conversations in the beginning can set realistic expectations. No one makes it through parenting without some broken sleep but having a vague game plan to fall back on when things feel tough, can reduce the shock of the impact if it caught you off guard." Pat, Dad of 2, Jordan 3 years, Summer 4 months

3. Prepare for the unpredictable 

Newborn and child sleep can be chaotic. By the time you’ve got to grips with one thing, they grow and something else changes so how can you prepare? 

  • Understanding what’s within the realm of typical behavior (frequent feeds, short sleep cycles, catnaps) helps reduce the “Are we doing this wrong?” stress and midnight google spirals.
  • Finding your Family Rhythm. Teamwork is critical. If you have a partner, setting expectations and agreeing what is fair and practical is an important part of your sleep strategy.  Factors such as work, siblings, helping hands and individual needs are all important factors to consider.  But one thing is certain - discussing ahead of time and acknowledging that the primary carer will need time to rest, can help reduce conflict and resentment
  • Confidence comes from context. When you know what to expect, you can filter advice with more clarity and consider what best suits you, your values and what’s right for your family. This guide included! 

4. Set up a soft landing (not a perfect one)

There's a lot of change and things you just can't prepare for with a baby or when a regression hits but setting up some essentials to support yourself for the tough times can really soften the landing. Here are some of our practical tips to prepare your environment ahead so you're as comfortable as you can be when it happens!

Practical Prep

Set up for success
A night stand, trolley, caddy - anything that can house all the essentials like feeding supplies, snacks, a charger, headphones, water bottle etc so you have everything you need in one easy to locate place
Put your support on speed dial
Save lactation consultants, parent groups, mental wellbeing and local support services in your phone now and add the keyword ‘support’ to their contact card. You never know when you’ll need it and you’ll only need to remember one word.
Mental Game Strong
What’s your “emergency pause” plan when the overwhelm hits? Deep breaths. Step outside? Play your favorite song? Having something ready to go if the frustration creeps in can be helpful. No judgement if you need to hide in the pantry for 5 minutes!
Food for thought
We hate to be cliché, but fuelling yourself with the good stuff will help you feel better physically so getting some of the best nutritious snacks or meals you can and being prepared to eat one handed is helpful... and a new skill you will maintain for the rest of your life!
"Whether it’s a friend dropping off food or a grandparent folding laundry, let them. You’re doing double (or triple) the work already and support is essential, not indulgent" - Mareaka, Mom of Felix 18 months

5. Reframe Your Expectations - Grace Over Guilt

When sleep (or life) feels unpredictable, it’s easy to feel like you're falling short. But babies don’t need perfect parents, they need responsive, loving ones and you’ve got that in the bag already just by being here. 

What this might look like:

  • Let go of comparison - every baby, family, and sleep journey is different. Some babies sleep like a dream and others not so much.
  • Some days, survival is success. If your house looks like a tiny tornado came for tea and the nap doesn’t happen, that’s okay.
  • Celebrating small wins - even 10 minutes of quiet, a successful feed, or asking for help is worth acknowledging.
  • You and your baby are still getting to know each other and being a parent, of 1 or your 5th, there is always more to learn and understand so please please PLEASE- be kind to you. You really are doing better then you think.
"This hard stretch won’t last forever. But your kindness to yourself will shape how you get through it." Shani, Mom of 2 Coco 5yrs, Bodhi 7yrs

Finding your village

No matter how many babies you’re caring for and no matter how little sleep you’re getting - this season is not forever. It can be tough, but so are you and it’s not about doing it all perfectly. It’s about navigating through with as much rest and support as you can so that you’re awake enough to experience and enjoy all the magic, that means the most. 

Finding a virtual community or new parent group can be lifesaving so even if you don’t have in-person help, be proactive, be brave and seek out people who support you. You don't have to feel alone.

We’re with you, cheering you on through the tough nights, messy days, and little wins!

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